


Heartworm

by badlifechoices



Series: barrison comment ficlets in no particular order [2]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-30 09:38:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6418336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badlifechoices/pseuds/badlifechoices
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Barry of his time, the one he harbours nothing but hate and contempt for, is different. The world has hardened him, shaped him into someone who hasn’t entirely lost that wish to do good but who has been robbed of all of that childish naivety.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heartworm

**Author's Note:**

> Heartworm
> 
> A relationship or friendship that you can't get out of your head, which you thought had faded long ago but is still somehow alive and unfinished like an abandoned campsite whose smoldering embers still have the power to start a forest fire

“You look so young. And I could kill you right now so easily. What I wouldn't have given all those times before to have had you like this. So helpless.” So vulnerable, so entirely at his mercy. Eobard muses, looking down at the young unconscious man lying on the cot like he has so often in the past months. The silence of the lab weighs heavily on his shoulders, only disturbed by the gentle humming of the various instruments. The lights are dimmed, the flickering screens and lights casting the room in a cool, blue light. His eyes travel over the pale skin, adorned with sensors and cables that do not only keep him alive but regulate his every breath, every heartbeat. Eobard has been spending too much time in here with him, he’s no longer sure if he’s really talking to Barry or himself. He’s gotten used to the stillness following his answers, used to the unsatisfying feeling of speaking but not being heard.

He sighs, tearing his gaze away from the comatose boy and back to the monitor. The readings are still the same, no change, always static. He swallows down the doubt that keeps invading his mind, the fear that he’s doing something wrong, that he won’t succeed. He reminds himself that it’ll take more time, that Barry will wake up and he will be the Flash. Everything will happen as it is supposed to. It has to, Gideon confirmed it, confirms it still. “But fate, it's tricky, isn't it? I come here to destroy you and then to get home, I have to be the one who creates you.” He’s found it amusing at first, the irony of the situation but there is something gnawing at the back of his brain, something is bothering him. He’s not sure he wants to understand, wants to explore what this feeling is that keeps invading his chest when he gazes at this young man he knows so well.

“But I will say, it's been an education, watching you grow up all these years. Science fairs and soccer games. No hint, no sign, no trace of the man you will be one day…” Of course he’s kept an eye on the boy, he needed to in order to ensure his future. That’s what he told himself in those moment when he found himself lingering, observing how the boy grew into a man, this smart, gifted boy who was nothing but enthusiastic about his science, nothing but determined to figure out how the world works. And yet, the longer he watched the more difficult it became to see this boy as the man he got to know. He’s nothing like the Flash, Eobard thinks. The Barry of his time, the one he harbours nothing but hate and contempt for, is different. The world has hardened him, shaped him into someone who hasn’t entirely lost that wish to do good but who has been robbed of all of that childish naivety.

Before he knows it, he’s reaching out, brushing his fingertips over the cool skin of Barry’s cheek. His fingers linger for a moment as though there’s an invisible force holding them there. There’s something about him that makes Eobard feel responsible, no, it’s not that simple. Eobard is conflicted. He still hates him, hates him for what he will become, what he will do but at the same time he feels the strange urge to protect him. He wants to keep Barry safe, protect him from this cold, harsh world that will hurt him so much, threaten to break him even. In the quiet moments when he can’t stop his mind from straying, he finds himself imagining what could happen if he did just that: Protect him. Would he ruin everything? Would the timeline find a way to make everything worse, to replace one disaster with another one, more devastating and destructive even? There’s another image that he tries his best to forget about but it lingers at the back of his head: The Flash at his side, his creation, his to command, his to keep…

“So vulnerable.” He mumbles to himself, whispers it into the silence of the lab like he’s afraid to say it out loud. Seeing him like this makes Eobard wish he could shelter him, embrace him and never let go. It’s a mere instinct, surely it has to be. But what if there’s more to it? He pushes the thought aside, drawing his hand back as though the smooth skin of the boy’s face has burnt him. He swallows around the lump in his throat and looks away, quickly stepping away from the cot. He needs to remember his purpose, needs to keep in mind why he’s here in the first place and what this man has done to him, _will_ do to him. There can be no forgiveness not even when the thought of hurting this young man makes his chest ache.

“I promise you, Barry Allen, I will kill you.”

**Author's Note:**

> it's been a while but I'm still sailing this ship! so here's another little thing, maybe I'll find the time and inspiration to write a longer fic at some point but for not enjoy a bunch of little ficlets


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